The Lumpkins
After trying for over a year to get pregnant, Tripp and I sought the help of a fertility specialist and started IVF treatments. We were elated when the first pregnancy test came back positive - and we were even more excited when we soon learned I was pregnant with twin girls! The first 20 weeks of pregnancy were pure bliss – I felt great and I was so proud to be carrying twins! However, at 20 weeks and 5 days, I noticed some bleeding and went into my OB’s office. I was told I had advanced cervical dilation and I was immediately sent to UNC Hospital. I was in complete shock and confused on the drive to Chapel Hill, but I figured the specialists at the hospital would be able to fix whatever was wrong. Upon admission into the hospital and after speaking with the head high risk OB, I realized just how our serious the problem was. We were told that a rescue cerclage was the only option to possibly save our daughters, so I proceeded with the surgery in hopes this would solve all the issues.
I stayed a couple of days at the hospital for monitoring, and when I left the hospital the doctors appeared somewhat optimistic that I could avoid preterm labor with progesterone and bedrest for the remainder of my pregnancy. To say Tripp and I were terrified is an understatement! Every time I felt something internally, went to the restroom, basically did anything, I was filled with anxiety. It was extremely hard for me to sit in the bed without my mind wandering – I could hardly focus on a TV show. After only 4 long days at home, I began bleeding again. I rushed back to the hospital where I was told I would stay there until I delivered the babies. I kept praying that I could make it at least 4 more weeks for the twins to make it to viability, but the hours moved so slowly. Three emotionally excruciating days later in the hospital, things went from bad to worse - I experienced preterm prelabor rupture of membranes (pPROM) and I developed a serious infection. The doctors explained to me that due to the infection, I had no choice but to deliver my girls and that they would not survive. It seemed like the cruelest of jokes. On June 25, 2011, I was induced and I delivered Ava and Mary Edith with no signs of life. Having to leave the hospital without my daughters was the saddest moment of my life. The subsequent grief, anger, and self-blame were often unbearable. It was the first time I had experienced such an overwhelming sadness that brought to my knees. I pray that no one ever has to feel this.
With time and love and prayers from family, friends, and a wonderful postpartum therapist, life slowly got better. However, there was a huge hole in my heart, and I wanted to be a mother more than I ever wanted anything in my life. Seven months later, on Tripp’s 32nd birthday, I was implanted with our last frozen fertilized egg, and I found out 2 weeks later that I was pregnant with my daughter, Evelyn! As excited as we were, we were also terrified. For this pregnancy, at 8 weeks, I started seeing the high risk OB on a weekly basis. At 13 weeks, I went to the hospital to have a scheduled cerclage and then I started on weekly progesterone shots (17P) to prevent preterm labor. While everything went smoothly with the pregnancy, the entire 9 months was filled with intense anxiety and fear. I lived for each weekly sonogram so that I could see Evelyn and make sure the cerclage was holding. I also lived for each progesterone shot in hopes that it would hold off preterm labor. After 38 weeks of weekly trips to the doctor’s office, many, many calls to the nurse and weekly shots, I carried Evelyn to full term. It was the best day of my life!!
Two and half years later, I got pregnant with Parker and I followed the same routine as with Evelyn – weekly sonograms, a cerclage at 13 weeks, and weekly 17P shots. I carried him to full term too!
Tripp and I joined the March of Babies in April 2012 as a way to remember Ava and Mary Edith and to help raise money for the March of Dimes so that they could find a way to stop preterm pregnancies so that no family has to go through what we did.
We are grateful and honored to be serving as the Signature Chefs Auction Ambassador Family and to be giving back to an organization whose mission is inspired by all babies – those born healthy and those that need help to survive and thrive. We are hopeful for the day when a mother’s first touch of her baby will not be through hand holes in an incubator in the NICU, when a mother does not leave the hospital without carrying her baby in her arms, and when babies will not be born too early to survive.
